Pasted

Previous Parts:
 Entropic Arc
 The End of a Saga (Part 1) - https://pastebin.com/9w27Erq7 (August 23, 2022)
The Road to Finding Inner Peace Within Myself (Part 2) - https://pastebin.com/rXaQxdwR (Sept. 25, 2022)
The Time Dilation Effect (Part 3) - https://pastebin.com/AAa2iAxa (Oct. 12, 2022)
The Ultimate Sacrifice (Part 4) - https://pastebin.com/SvbkA8FC (Oct. 24, 2022)
The Nomad's Guide to the Digital Life (Part 5) - https://pastebin.com/S21MY4pN (Nov. 9, 2022)
 Grand Sky Arc
 Dawn of a Stoic, Holistic, Intimate, Empathetic Hero (Dec. 6, 2022) - https://pastebin.com/7FSs02ZK
Love is a Physiological Motivator, Not An Emotion Nor Object (Jan 22, 2023) - https://pastebin.com/0tdqg0Jb - Current
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 [Love is a Physiological Motivator, Not An Emotion Nor Object]
 First of all, I do want to give a shoutout for a ton of people that dropped by on VRChat around New Years Eve’. It was easily my best one as a lot of people I met last year all came on to celebrate it. It ranged from people that I’ve met when I first started playing back in 2019 to more recently a ton of people that I met in 2022. Including the people I’ve cared and loved along the way. A very sentiment feeling that became the peak of 2022 really. The feeling of nostalgia, rekindled bonds and all that really hit home the value and meaning behind making connections with people you care about.
 Leading off into that… Since New Years’ Eve, I’ve been listening to a lot of peoples’ personal stories and situations. I’ve witnessed people being used in bad ways, being trapped in the bird cage of people telling them what to do… You name it, I’ve likely heard of it.
 As I’ve been chilling and listening to other people in a general space or public audience, there is one thing that stuck me as odd.
 It seems that a lot of people have objectified romantic partners and the concept of love as the end-all, be-all, number one magical miraculous cure to end their depression. Many public instances I’ve come to across this subject tend to say such things as, “Man I can’t find people! You feel me?” Or the, “I can’t trust no man / woman anymore.” And later hear how upset they are when it doesn’t work out. Which then ends up writing their bio or status as something hateful towards a group of people, when in reality it is the individual at fault that has hurt them. I can not blame them that they didn’t know the individual’s intentions, but I don’t share any sentiment on repeat offenders who don’t learn the value of getting to know someone and just jumping into another romantic relationship so quickly. I have seen several people even when I advise them to please take the time to know the person, they immediately jump into another romantic relationship in only knowing the person for three days. It’s… A recipe for disaster to say the least.
 Up until this point, the nature of ‘to love’ has some elements of mystery in itself. It becomes a bigger one regarding myself. But I’ll touch on how it impacts me later.
 Love is definitely not something that can be easily replicated because of the nature of the behavior in itself is more attuned to the feelings arising in the moment. Love has different meanings depending on the relationship of the current person. For example: Loving a family member is different than loving a best friend or a partner. Love is a perplexing state to be in where a lot of things will warp your reality to feel as that you will want to be with the person you choose to be with your life and in that context, love to that degree is a social contract when taken to that extent.
 Yes, I said contract. This right here while not all people are aware of it, this is exactly why the feelings of jealousy and being hurt come into play big time. Because Love does leave you into a vulnerable state where you want that person to acknowledge your existence and especially replicate that back. For if those conditions are not met, that it can hurt for sure. I don’t blame people who decide to walk away if they don’t get what they want, but at the same time it does feel like a very shallow mindset to have (in my opinion at least). Love when viewed in such a binary way of “I either have them in my life as a lover, or I will never have them in any capacity at all”, it is quite a dangerous mindset, dare I say, a toxic one… A very unintentional one. Because the important element of love and having a romantic relationship is this: Both people must consent and make it clear that they have the intention of wanting to be together in a romantic sense. You can love someone as much as you want, but if they don’t want that, or they simply just don’t feel the same for you? It is what it is, really… You can not control how the other person thinks, and this is where I’ve seen a lot of dangerous stories of love come to play. This is where things become even more toxic to the point where people will do almost anything they want just to claim that person as theirs. 
 When in the first place… That just ruins the whole social ecosystem and a general vibe of being able to trust people enough to have a simple conversations. Now, to trust someone to EVEN HAVE A DECENT CONVERSATION is the equivalent of doing a Background Check for work. Because unfortunately, not all people want to have a casual conversation for the fun of it. 
 Let’s think about it. A lot of people put their personal details in their bio. When in reality unless it’s a dating app, this is not usually done out of courtesy. It’s usually done out of either obligation or because they are actively looking for someone that fulfills the role. Whether it is for friendship or for romance, that’s up to the individual at the end of the day. I prefer talking to people and getting to know them by asking questions instead of per-say, reading every basic detail about them. It just makes the time spent with the person more meaningful if when you get to ask them, you happen to have common interests. This is something that was present and basically had to be done before the internet became a thing. 
 In the present day thanks to the internet, the net is wide to meet all sorts of people online, but all the conveniences now come to the cost where people are preemptively filtering themselves because of things outside their control like what race they are born and so on. 
 While it seems like an exciting prospect to find out those feelings of love and to indulge and live in the moment, it is definitely a feeling that you may outgrow over time depending on your life experiences and what kind of people you’ve met. It especially boils down to how you perceive life and how much you meditate and look into the Philosophy of Life.
 Love is a journey that can feel peaceful and wondrous when you meet someone you connect well. It can also be a turbulent time when the romantic relationship does end. At least to almost everyone. I have my own thoughts of the matter after getting into a couple myself last year. Wait a minute, I’d never imagine I’d say those words actually. Hah hah hah…
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 [My Personal Disclaimers]
 Now, some big disclaimers are to be made right here. 
 Outside of 2022, I haven’t had a romantic relationship in almost a decade. There were small flings here or there, but they never developed into that level. I spent most of that time on developing myself in a personal level since I was quite depressed then and had a much bleaker outlook to life as a whole at the time. 
 My profession lies in technology. I was in college for Computer Science and Mathematics, never finished that though. My curiosity with getting to know people and socializing a lot online for many years, a lot of those people tell me their personal stories, and meeting some people in person are my foundations. 
 Alright, disclaimer time is over. 
 [About Critical Hit’s Perspective On Romance]
 Romance is a fundamental step in getting to know yourself more. But it is a very advanced subject and topic in nature to go through. When you’ve learned all there is to yourself on your own terms and you can find relative peacefulness within yourself, being content of the positives you provide and acknowledging that there are flaws that will be likely there to stay, but you can work around them. Acquiring several strong friendships would be the next step in the social life perspective. 
 Rather, in the elevated state of romance. You’re rather learning about what it takes to support someone you idealize and being able to genuinely reciprocate a level of trust and care by designating that person you see highly, and that same level of immersive care is applied back to you. To finally acquire honest feedback about yourself, both good and bad because you see this person as someone important to uncover an element of yourself that you alone can not discover.
 The biggest mistake that I see here is that romance is mixed up with bed time, and a fair share of people jump to conclusions on that one. If the only thing in that romantic relationship is tied down by bed time, and unless both people actually want that, it will likely not be a fulfilling relationship. Because that’s only focusing on one part. Both people should grow and be the best versions of themselves and be able to support each other unconditionally. Even to the point of caring for someone unconditionally because you want what’s best for them in a general sense and ready to have the idea that people can change their minds over time. And if people can’t grow or learn from each other, that’s where eventually one person will fall out of love.
 The next mistake that is just as big is the idea that the idea loving someone so much that you go over board with pick up lines or liking someone for their looks alone as the basis of ‘why you like someone’.
 And the third thing with romance is that when it ends, a lot of people associate that for bad reasons because that’s usually the case from what I hear. However, I have personally experienced a time where I myself was let go and when provided feedback, it was never for anything wrong. I even asked her if there was anything I could improve on myself and I was told no, and that she still cares for me in a general sense. I gathered the pieces that it’s entirely possible that people can fall out of love and learn more about themselves in the process. And you know what? I respect that 100%, I still love that lady to this day because I considered her the best thing that came to my life simply because she opened the door of how a romantic relationship should be handled. It shouldn’t be pressured at all. It shouldn’t feel like a salesman trying to sell you something.
 It just happens over the idea of enjoying the presence of that company…
 It just happens because you enjoy the idea of being together with that person and a lot of common interests collided, especially on the perception of how we view people and life as a whole. To which that’s surprising because she’s quite a busy person and we rarely met. Yet each time we did meet, it contributed towards a romantic relationship despite the general vibe being that we just chilled and talked about random stuff that happened with life. I ended up getting nuked with a confession over me finishing this entire PasteBin about Romance… Except I more or less talked about the “Mistakes” aspect of people and how there’s a general decline in having chill conversations… 
 There will be moments in life where you may need to be the person to end that romantic relationship. I’d say on my personal experience, the biggest reason I would have to end a romantic relationship came from a previous relationship where I saw that individual needed to learn the ability to self-respect and love themselves first. Even when I did my best, we were not on the same page on a few occasions, and they had their validation because their friends understood them more than I could. There were other elements to that particular romantic relationship, and awoken to what I’m romantically attracted to as well. So, I made that decision to end it after sleeping on it a few nights when all those elements came to light. I wish to be still friends and keep in touch from time to time, but it ended up being declined and I was removed from their line of sight. I wish them the best with their life because they imparted me an invaluable opinion on myself. That I’m “More than enough”. They helped me defeat the ever feeding loop about never feeling like I’m enough for people, no matter how hard I try. Really, thank you for that. You have no idea how much that means to me.
 That’s the other thing with romance to realize. Always be thankful for the people that are honest with their feelings and are serious about you. Be extremely thankful for people that give you a chance to be close to their heart, and be the best person you can be for them. That way, when it ends romantically, you will have no regrets. That all the good times they give you and especially the knowledge you learn about yourself? It will give you a constant feedback loop of positivity. It gives you the idea that people value you that much that THEY ARE WILLING TO GIVE YOU THEIR HEART. 
 The act in itself after knowing people for a decent amount of time that they will care and love you for who you are as a person? That unconditional love regardless of how far you are or that you’re struggling with certain elements in your own life, but if you still do your best to live against the odds. People are attracted to that idea. 
 At the beginning or very early on in your life, people on a physical level are attracted to someone who looks really pretty or is wealthy kind of like how the Animal Kingdom works and Darwinism’s Survival of the Fittest to provide the best life currently and the people that show up in the future. But those are all theories at the end of the day and they apply to animals. We are humans so it’s more complex than that.
 Because the ultimate factor at the end of the day is dependent on: How you want to live your life and what you want out of it.
 While there are general guidelines of who is suitable to be in a romantic relationship or not, there is a lot of nuance in what the individual themselves want and how the individuals’ core values line up and if particular ones match up a lot, it would likely trigger romantic feelings. 
 In my case at least, I had been surprised the most over normal interactions because I deliberately keep my expectations low. Unless people tell me straight up, I’ll just wander around the world like an NPC and assume people have their own things they got in their life. My own personal goal with life is to interact with all kinds of people socially and learn from people what their lives are like, as well as having a good laugh or two.
 Now… Because there’s multiple types of how the romance forms. That’s where romance starts to be more of a deep dive.
 The fundamental of becoming romantic is to love.
 That word has been mentioned quite a bit but there was not an explicit definition from myself. And this will be depressing and scientific here when I say this but: 
 Love is an immense action where you are enamored by the interpretation of who and how the individual represents themselves through any of the following elements of: Personality, physical attributes, their perception of how life works, the company they provide, and potential to grow with the individual. 
 When we get that definition out of the way. Now, how does a romantic relationship form? Well:
 There are people that form romantic relationships from common interests.
There are people that form romantic relationships because they intend to want to start a family with the individual.
There are people that form romantic relationships entirely for collating and influencer fame. 
There are people that form romantic relationships because both people don’t want to feel alone, and that they can settle with that individual both their pros and cons of their personalities.
 But ultimately, the people involved that form that romantic relationship can make their own definition from there. That’s the beauty of a romantic relationship. Amazing ones know that a romantic relationship is a process and can learn to respect each others’ boundaries even when it is over. 
 Because of how intimate romance can be, the dangers of being in one is that there can be a possibility of losing someone in the process in speaking terms. If you come across someone who is obsessed with only loving one individual or go home, that’s almost a guarantee of losing someone, even if they don’t say it. I know this because a previous relationship had resulted into just that. They did not have the capacity to see me just as friends even after the romantic relationship was over. And that’s their choice and their right to exercise, and I wish that individual the best.
 Love is probably the most potent addiction to have if it is not taken seriously or you go through it without taking proper care of one’s self mentally because it can create a co-dependency of sorts alongside all the negatives such as being jealous, being bad mannered to any people they deem as a ‘potential competition’, and so on. It is easy to say all this if you have yet to experience love, or if you’ve been through that feeling a handful of times. But for everyone else, this is not an easy aspect to get over. And only by risking it to experience the beauty and hardships in romantic relationships, that’s when the individual starts to learn a lot (potentially).
 I say potentially, because there are people that go through a lot of romantic relationships to then draw the conclusion of “Oh Men / Women are evil, bad and stinky! I know this because I dated a lot of them!” But that is a very misleading statement. Without looking to the root cause of why the relationships ended, and let’s say yes there are people who do bad things when you get to know someone like cheating. If it happened to you once or twice and you did the best you could researching that they seemed really chill, sure. That is unfortunate that it happened in the first place and the anger is justified. But when you catch several people cheating on you, the fault tends to be more on the individual for the basis of how they choose their partners and not doing due diligence of getting to know the person more before getting into one. Or another case is easily blaming it on other people first and not consider the possibility that you, yourself have had some element of making the romantic relationship not work such as being difficult to work with during arguments. 
 This in turn, tends to be a big factor as to why the social landscape is heavily skewed on ‘having fun first, commitment too scary’. There’s a balance in play where you should focus on enjoying a casual conversation first and when it is okay to start making plans. Because for example: to jump from a casual conversation to talking about wanting a family right after you say you like them is way too big of a leap. That creates extremely unrealistic expectations, and I see things of that nature happen on a weekly basis. I understand that we have a limited time to live our lives, but it shouldn’t feel desperate. That’s something across the board just about everyone have experienced. The same thing goes for influencers who have fans, they almost never date their fans because the love for that person is because of their content more than anything else. Which to be fair, that is also another big disconnect and was flat out told about that if I like and admired them like a fan, then a romantic relationship wouldn’t be possible. 
 Even then, there are always amazing and great people out there and life happens. People that were taken break up, and people that broke up end up being with different people. Rather, I’d say there’s positives and negatives to both being single and being in a relationship. 
 One grants you more freedom.
The latter grants a person that will be there for you potentially for life.
 The emphasis of needing to be in a romantic relationship is another difficult thing to see because an overwhelmingly amount of people feel like that’s what they need, and when it gets compounded with the individual having additional problems within themselves, it makes it that much more difficult. It’s why I always advocate people to work on themselves first if they ever feel lost or confused. If there’s something you do not know about yourself that can be learned through yourself, you should take the time to find out about yourself to the best of your ability. And if you need honest feedback about yourself? Just ask someone you trust that know you. Or just ask feedback about yourself to anyone in speaking terms in general. You’ll end up finding a thing or two you are not aware of that could be very helpful on yourself. 
 Yes, I was hesitant on asking about myself because I took people’s word of silence meaning that they don’t think of me as a friend or anything like that, when it’s really not the case. Sometimes, peoples’ actions speak louder than words and if people go out of their way to find you and approach you? It’s pretty good odds that they enjoy your company. And enjoying that company I shall.
 You should too, it’s good for you.
 Just remember, people that are open to seeing you for life are the best kind of people to have. It may not guarantee or lead into anything romantic right now. But having a foundation of people that will look out for you and you doing the same, is a pretty strong foundation to start building romance when things line up your way.
 Because by that time, if you surround yourself with honest people who want what’s best for you and can mutually enjoy conversations together, and learn from each other? That act in itself will pave a good road for even better things to come. 
 Romance just happens to be one of those side effects. Heh heh…
 [Hey Crit I Like You]
 That’s nice. Alright it’s time for me to get cancelled and mass removed on VRChat and Discord.
 Just so you know, my biggest requirement is that we need to spend time together doing mutual hobbies that we both enjoy. That includes voice calls. That part is non-negotiable. 
 I ramble a lot about stuff like this. Now I’ve yet to meet anyone that can match or exceed having intellectual conversations of this nature in any aspect, but that’s almost a sure fire way for me to notice you if you make good effort to participate in them. Exceeding them while being open minded and respectful is likely going to give me a heavy bias on that individual. 
 Naturally, I’ve left a lot of information about myself so you will definitely know beforehand if I’m a good fit for you. Go ahead and read up on me it’s out there.
 Because otherwise, I will wander off and end up vibing daily online to random public lobbies and whoever messages me that wants to hang out with me? I’ll go for that too.
 My best advice to you is be yourself and if you have interest, keep in touch. By default I end up dedicating some time to meet new people but in due time, I will enjoy the company if things do line up and I send a message or two. But if it is not reciprocated back, I will assume you are no longer interested in having a conversation with me or life just happened to you, and I’ll move on to do my own thing.
 Now my biggest flaw is that I don’t have a heart right now. I at the moment lack the capacity to love. Greyromantic & Demiromantic at that. The “grey” means the ability to love is so little. I’m saying this right now so you can make an informed decision. It’s also likely because I’m too self-aware of life in itself to actually develop those feelings.
 What I’m basically telling you right, is I’m not going to be an easy person to get if your intentions are going to be romantic.
 Take this information as you will, I’m just going to lay down here and do nothing in VRChat as I usually do.